Teaching our children to listen, trust, and obey is challenging at times! Some days are great, some days are awful, but we keep persevering because we know that obedience is a lifelong, yet, crucial journey. First we obey our mommies when they say, "freeze," because they might see a car coming down the road that we didn't see. Then we learn to respect and submit to our bosses because we understand how healthy authority works in our role at work. Ultimately, we teach obedience because we want our kids to learn that God is GOOD and we can trust and obey Him and His Word. He knows all. He understands all. Even the things that seem weird or confusing have a purpose in His commands.
Have you ever yelled at your kids to come inside the house....more than once? I hope I'm not alone! I've really worked hard with the Lord the last decade to not yell at my kids unless it's truly necessary--like when they're stepping off the curb into traffic (which has totally happened before). Helping our kids learn to obey the first time they're given an instruction doesn't happen overnight. It's something we are working on for the long haul. If we ask them to "come inside" multiple times then start yelling at them to come inside, we've basically just taught them to ignore us the first three times and only listen to us when we're mad and hollering. I don't know about you, but I want my kids to respect me enough to trust and obey the first time. We aim to practice extravagant grace daily at our home--but it's also important for us to teach trusting obedience. When I tell my kids to come inside I want them to obey the first time--not the hundredth. I want them to obey my words because they trust me. Sometimes I might be feeling lazy as a mom and not want to follow through with discipline, so I'll keep saying, "come inside please!" This is not helpful in the long run. I need to follow through and keep "my word" as a mom and have a consequence when my children don't want to obey--which is hard and tiring at times.
The other day I was feeling like a junior high boy at heart. Yes, if you didn't know it already, I'm the immature one in this marriage, and probably in our home! I can be pretty goofy and fun when I'm not trying to live the Type A life! Ha! Anyway, my boys were playing out back and having a blast! (I love their love for one another!) It was time to come inside for lunch so I hollered out back, "hey guys, time to come in" and they replied, "okay, mom" but then never came in. So I hollered out back again, but to no avail. Then a genius idea popped into my head! I waltzed over to the fridge remembering that we happened to have some whip cream in there. (That is a special treat in our house for special occasions only, so it was unusual for me to actually have some on hand!) I then opened the window and stood right in front of it so the boys could see my full profile. I raised the whip cream up in the air and tilted my head back with my mouth open wide. Are you picturing this? I proceeded to spray whip cream in my mouth full force, multiple times! My daughter who was giggling beside me opened her mouth and I happily sprayed some whip cream in hers! Do you know the sound that a can of whip cream makes when it's being sprayed? My kids can pick up that sound anywhere I feel like! Wanna know what happened next? The boys came RUNNING to the window with huge grins and burst through the back door frantically. "Mama! Mama! Can I have some please?!" they exclaimed. "I'm sorry honey, you didn't come the first time I called you. If you would have come the first time I would have been glad to give you some." The boys were giggling and pleading with me, "please, Mama! please!" they begged. It was everything I could do to not give in and share some whip cream with them. I opened the fridge door and put the can back into its home slot on the fridge door shelf. Needless to say my boys were not pleased, though their smiles were still in tact! We kept giggling together about it and they kept begging for a little bit, but I held my ground. I felt peace in my heart that depriving them of a dollop of whip cream was punishment enough for not listening and coming inside the first time that I called them.
To this day we joke around and giggle when someone brings this memory up! I joke that, "my boys can't hear my voice but they can hear a can of whip cream in action a mile away!" All joking aside though, I want my children to know and follow my voice. If I am always having to yell to get someone's attention then it's a pretty good sign that respect and healthy fear of authority is no longer present. If I find myself raising my voice again and again, I know it's time to go back to the basics. For the next few days then we are in what my husband refers to as "bootcamp." Our kids have forgotten to obey and our voice has become void, so it's time to refresh their memory with how to respect authority. For the next few days there is very little grace--we give instructions once, and if they aren't obeyed then there is a consequence. At first it's rough, but then our kids start to come back to us and respect us, and most importantly they start to listen for our voice. They know we aren't out there to be "party poopers" and ruin their fun, but rather to protect them, guide them, and love them unconditionally. There's a special closeness that comes with your children when they have a healthy respect for you.
I hope this little story made you giggle and also remember the importance of teaching trusting obedience in our children. They are such a wonderful gift from our Father above--let's not be lazy in teaching them His ways, but have fun remembering that the goal of this whole parenthood thing is to lead them to the perfect Father, and pray that they will trust and obey Him for their entire lives because they know He is GOOD and trustworthy.